Ben's Speech

For those of you who didn't know, Ben was invited to be the commencement speaker at the Fisher Catholic High School graduation ceremony last week. Here is his speech.


"I would like to start at the beginning. In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. He said let there be light, and there was light. And God saw the light, and it was good, though He knew some people would question His choice of pale yellow for the lockers.
On the second day, God said let there be a firmament to divide the upper from the lower. And call this upper Heaven, and call this lower Miss Henry’s math class.
On the third day, God said let there be earth, and let the earth bring forth grass, and let the trees bear pizza, salad, fruit, and milk. And God saw it. And it was good.
On the fourth day, God said let the day be divided from the night, and let the day be divided into eight periods, plus homeroom. Let homeroom be eighteen minutes long, so students can copy their homework.
On the fifth day God created creatures great and small and every creature that moveth. And he called it the Class of 2008. And He saw that it was good, for the most part. He was a little worried about Walter Shay. And God said unto them; be fruitful and multiply, but not until you’re married and have a decent job.
On the sixth day God created a creature in His own image, and called her Mom. He gave her dominion over all the lesser creatures in all study halls.
On the seventh day God rested, but not too much; He had a big test in Stevenson’s class on Monday.

Actually, the beginning for me at Fisher was 1991. Little did I realize then how prominent a role this school would play in my life. I sat in the classrooms of Wellstead, Reade, Henry and Stevenson. Little did I realize then how much I owed to these people. I ran, I tackled, I pitched, I hit, I danced (badly), I studied (a little), I partied (a little too much). Little did I realize then what God had in store for me.

In fact, I didn’t realize much of anything back then. I was sleepwalking through life, unaware of the beauty of the world and the tremendous love of my family and friends. I drifted from school to practice to home to social events to college to a job as though in a dream, never choosing anything purposefully, somnolent and unaware. There were certainly glimpses of self-awareness along the way, one of which occurred as I sat where you are now, green cap and gown, wading through clichés and platitudes. While I cannot promise to spare you completely from platitudes, I urge you strongly to find self-awareness and a sense of purpose.

Now just how to do that is another matter. My awakening took place on June 7th of last year when I was diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. While being diagnosed with a terminal illness is a sure path to self-awareness, I can’t say I recommend it. I don’t lament my fate; the only regret I have is that it took me thirty years to awaken.

Instead, take a moment right now to put yourself in the place of your mother or father or someone that cares for you. Now take on all their worries and concerns. Imagine living their life; where they’ve been, what they do every day, what their desires are, what their goals are. You may find that it is through empathy, through getting away from our own petty concerns and desires, that we find the quickest path to self-awareness. You may also find that you do not have enough information to conduct this experiment; you may not know what the desires of your parents are. You may not know where they’ve been. In that case, ask them. Ask them where they were when they were 25 years old . Ask them what they wanted to be when they grew up. Ask them where they want to be in 20 years. It doesn’t have to be a Hallmark moment, just talk to them as if they were a normal person you want to get to know better.

Let’s practice the empathy thing by telling you more about me and how I live every day. I’ll warn you that you are about to hear the reality; it is gritty and it may offend those among you who are sensitive. First, farting. I cannot raise my leg when sitting down, which means gas cannot escape, making it very uncomfortable. I also cannot pick my nose very well, so I am robbed of that immense feeling of satisfaction that comes with unclogging your nose by removing a big booger. On the plus side I get license to refer to flatulence and nose-picking in public.

Seriously, though, you know enough about me. If there is one thing I want you to learn from my situation, it is not to appreciate your physical health – though that is important, there is something much more important. It is that your own will and desires are the least important for your happiness. They may be important for your wealth or social status or worldly power, but not for your happiness. Have you ever seen Father Franks without a smile on his face? I bet he’s smiling right now. I’m sure he would tell you the reason he is so happy is he dedicates his life to serving others. You don’t have to be a priest to be happy, but I think you do have to be unselfish.

I think I enjoyed teaching for a reason that I didn’t realize until last June; because it is a serving profession. You, the class of 2008, have made me especially happy. I have shared with you some of the most intimate and special moments of my career, even of my life. Do you remember the poems we wrote last year? Who could forget “saum de weet de weet de saum”? And of course this past year I will never forget the kindness and generosity of spirit you showed me at the time I most needed it.. Not only did you raise money, sponsoring your own walk for als, but you supported me every day in the classroom and the halls, providing me with the faith and the courage to get up every day. I urge you now to take that same generosity of spirit and spread it to the world. It will be difficult. You will be more on your own, and at times you will feel utterly alone. It is then, when you are most alone, that you must look to the needs of others.

I spoke earlier of will and desire. The more I ponder the events of my life, the more I see a purpose and a will not my own, and the more I realize that things could have turned out no other way. I find a strange comfort in this thought – I really have come around to the belief that I was meant, by God, to get ALS, not as a punishment, but for some other more nebulous and higher purpose.

And so, as you venture into a world filled with selfishness and greed, love and beauty, evil and corruption, and holiness and charity, look not to fulfill your own desires. As you have done with me, earn the gratitude of those you encounter by your selflessness and generosity of spirit. If you do, you will increase love and beauty. If you follow the path of your own will to the end, you will be defying the will of God. Instead, pray to God that He make His will known to you; that He reveal His purpose for your life. Then you can surrender your own will and live for others -- as Jesus taught.

Now my time at Fisher is ended, and I can think of no nobler or kinder group of people to end it with than you. I can only hope I have had a positive influence on your lives as so many teachers have for me. You, the class of 2008, have been a vital part of God’s plan for me, and I will remember you always with love and gratitude. Thank you.